A Great Big Cluster
by SpartanDelta2
Summary: What if Spock met Seven of Nine? Could Picard handle the grumpiness that is McCoy? And what if Kirk was brave enough to hit on Major Kira? A collection of one-shots in which our favorite characters from across the Trek-verse collide! Rated M just to be safe.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Alright kiddies! Have any of you ever wonder what would happen if your favorite (and maybe less favorite) Star Trek Universe Characters came together? Would Spock and Seven of Nine get along? How would Picard deal with McCoy's grumpiness? Could Kirk ever really woo Major Kira? Oh the hilarity! So, here's a lovely collection of one-shots for you! If you have any Characters that you would want to see mashed together, let me know through a message or a review!**


	2. SpockSeven

**A/N: So, in case I didn't say before, these stories are obviously very AU. I do not own Star Trek in any form of its creation, though sometimes I wish I did!**

_Commander Spock (2009) and Seven of Nine_

As he entered the Astrometrics Lab, he wondered who would be using it at this time of night. A young blonde woman stood at the controls, her back to him as she seemed to be calculating the path of a far off asteroid. He put his hands behind his back, and cleared his throat.

"There's no need for that." She said, her voice both even and slightly haughty sounding. He relaxed a bit, seeming confused, but she didn't stop her work. "The doors onboard star ships aren't exactly silent. I knew you were here, I was simply waiting for you to make it known as to why." Now she turned, and her calm mask could've rivaled even Sarek's. They simply looked at each other for a time.

"I was simply wondering who would feel the need to use the Astrometrics Lab at such a late hour. I apologize if I have kept you from some pressing work." He said simply. He tilted his head a tiny degree. "I do not believe we have met. I am Commander Spock." He didn't put out his hand, and she didn't seem to care whether he did or didn't.

"I am Seven of Nine." She stated simply, turning back to the controls on the console. He moved to stand next to her, observing what she was doing. "It is not usual for me to have someone hover while I work." She said, a trace of annoyance flowing into her tone. He raised an eyebrow, moving off to the side a few paces. She continued, and he saw that she was calculating not only the trajectory, but the mass, speed, and destructive power as well. They stood in silence until she was done.

"May I ask who gave the order to track the asteroid?" Spock was trying to think of who would want to know, except maybe one of the younger science officers. Seven of Nine didn't appear to have any rank, so it stood to reason that even a younger officer could give her orders.

"No one did. I find tracking space objects and learning the composition of nebulas. I'm fairly sure everyone onboard is allowed a 'hobby' correct?" She gave him a smug smirk, and his fists clenched behind his back. She was picking on him, and unlike when Jim or Leonard did it, it actually bothered him. She moved to pass him, and he grabbed her arm despite himself. She looked at him. "If you will excuse me, Commander," she seemed to sneer his rank, "I'm going to regenerate now." She pulled sharply from his grasp and strode out. He watched after her, wondering what it was that made him want to spend more time talking with her. He went back to his quarters for the night, spending most of it meditating.

**A/N: First! On we go!**


	3. Kirk, Kira, and Odo

**A/N: Number Two!**

_Captain James T. Kirk (2009) and Major Kira Nerys_

"So, what do I have to do to attract the attention of a Bajoran Major?" She heard the voice behind her, and going by Dax and Sisko's faces, it was exactly who she thought it was. She sighed heavily, turning to find Kirk behind her smirking. She rolled her eyes, moving to the lift. He followed, riding it down with her. The _Enterprise_ had only been docked at Deep Space Nine for two days, and Kira was already prepared to jettison its Captain out of an airlock. She headed for Odo's office, the Captain trailing along like a puppy.

"Captain Kirk, why don't you go to Quark's and bother the Dabo Girls? They, at least, get paid to be harassed by guys like you." His grin just widened.

"They're no fun." He moved so that he was in front of her, walking backwards so he could face her. She focused on her report, rereading them for the 5th time. She knew Odo didn't appreciate any mistakes. "Besides, you're obviously prettier than them." She smirked at his attempt at flattery, but she also knew that this needed to end soon. She thought over the men in her life: she couldn't ask Sisko to help; Bashir was all over Dax still, but that was about as fruitful as Kirk asking her; that left Quark and Odo, and the Prophets knew she wouldn't ask Quark for a bottle of water, let alone a favor. She just hoped Odo would play along. When they reached his office, she lightly pushed Kirk aside, walked in and shut the door behind her, locking it.

"Odo, I need your help with something." She said, handing him the report. He looked at her curiously, setting the report on his desk. "There's a star ship captain here, James Kirk. Well, he's sort of been harassing me the last two days, and even Sisko's warnings to him haven't helped, and if he doesn't stop soon, I might throw him out!" It all came out in a rush, and Kira was out of breath when she stopped. Odo had stood up and he glanced out the window, seeing Kirk standing and waiting. He knew his type, and knew just what to do.

"Major Kira, go about your day. I'll handle Captain Kirk." She looked relieved and he gave her a smile. They finished going over the reports, and Odo walked her to the door. "Ready?" He asked. At her nod, he opened the door, forcing a large smile on his face. "I'll see you at dinner tonight Kira." She blushed, picking up on where he was going, but nodded and smiled. Kirk looked floored as she headed back towards the command center. "Captain, you might want to bring your jaw up off the floor." Odo said gruffly before going back into his office. Unknown to either person, both Kira and Odo were sort of excited for their fake date that night. After all, they had to make it convincing, right?

**A/N: So, in case you couldn't tell, I totally ship Kodo. I SHIP IT! Review ^_^**


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